GAVE UP

Feel so overwhelmed all of a sudden. Like I feel so burdened by a lot of things. I find it so unfair that I have to bear the consequences of someone when clearly we warned him about all that could happen. He refused to heed our advice and continue being so self centered and just ruin his life like that, as if it was that fun to take medicine all the time and bear with the pain of having needles poking at you. 

Like seriously, why should I be burdened like this?? I'm 17 years old, time to venture out and experience life like I never would again. How many times would I get to be 17 again? None! This is my one and only chance but you know what? He has to be standing between my dreams and I, being a complete idiot and not knowing how much trouble he has brought to the people around him. 

I lost all respect for him since-I-don't-know when. People would say hey why be so mean? But all I can say is  that its hard for you to really feel what I feel unless you face people like him. Its insane.

I hate people who do not cherish life and treat everybody's care and concern like rubbish. Why do people like this exist?? He has the opportunity to live and enjoy life but he chose this hard route. Like seriously. -.- Never met anyone as selfish as this alr. I don't even have words to express my anger and indignant anymore.  

I give up.

And so because of him, I really dislike and really don't want to see people around me drink or smoke just cos it was what he did in the past. It turned him into someone that I could no longer rely on and someone who is extremely irresponsible and I don't want people around me to be like him. People like this, one is more than enough. Respect has to be earned. But he failed to earn my respect. And i'm not trying anymore. Enough. 

I know I am being very harsh but really I can stand it no more. I'm just glad that I have my mum with me. As I grew older, despite the arguments that I may have with my mum, I still love her nonetheless. Despite being very conservative, but I still respect her. She's the most important person in my life and i'm thankful for her.